Tuesday, April 12, 2011

My reply to John on Ray Boltz, Kirk Talley, and the Struggle

One of my pet peeves is when someone comments on one of my blogs with a registered user name, but no user profile or way to contact them. In the case of John, I'd like to reply to him, but there is no way other than a blog post, and I have no guarantee he will read this. He commented on a blog post I did some time back titled Ray Boltz, Kirk Talley, and the Struggle. Here is his comment: I found this blog from doing a search on the Talley Trio who happen to live in my small town here in East Tennessee. My Grandmother use to love the Talley's and I have met Kirk a couple times when I was younger ( he does not know me ), the last time was a year ago. I was shocked to see him waiting tables at a restaurant in Sevierville, Tn. I was curious as to why a man with his talent was working as a waiter. I looked up his name and found a couple stories that he was / is gay and also saw some pretty ugly things being said about him on so-called Christian web sites. First of all let me say that I am a 45 year old straight man who has been married since I was 18. Several years ago my 20 year old son called me and asked if I would like to go to lunch and talk. During our lunch he told me that he was gay..........yes, I was shocked. After the initial shock wore off I started to worry about him and would God except him in to Heaven. I prayed about it and I found peace in knowing that this is the way God made him and I know he would not turn his back on my son. In the 45 years I have been alive, not at one time have I ever thought I might be gay or any desires that would make me think that. That being said I knew at that point it was all going to be alright. It's almost like someone saying you can only get into Heaven if you are black, or female, or......well you get the point, we can't change who we are. I know without any doubt that God loves my son more than I do and that's a lot of love. I don't personally know Kirk but if I could set down with him and talk, I would tell him to stop living his life the way man thinks he should live and just do what God has put him on this earth to do. I am so happy that when the day comes that I leave this world I won't be judged by our high profile Christian leaders of today and they should also be as thankful. Our God expects a lot out of us, but to be something we're not is not one of them. If you really want to lead people to Christ, stop trying to figure out a way to change them, it's not your job. Love them, witness by example, let them see the joy in your heart, after a while they will want the same peace and joy you have.

I will try not to be long and belabor my points, as John may never even read this.


First off, John.. I think it is awesome that you didn't disown your son or react negatively about his sexuality. Kudos to you for that. That being said.....


God does not make anyone gay! You say you accept him the way God made him - you need to study from a Christian perspective what makes people gay - and it isn't God. It is negative things, such as bullying, no bonding with males their age, poor relationship with their father, controlling mother, low self image - stuff like that.


Acting homosexuals will go to hell. From the sound of it, you either believe your son is a Christian and gay, or you just assume he will go to Heaven no matter what. The Bible is very clear that an acting homosexual will go to hell, as a murder, thief, adulterer, etc. I wish it were not so, but a gay Christian must be celibate to be a Christian. I've read the arguments, and they are hogwash..... and if you believe them, then why are all of the other sexual acts God condemned still a sin? Bestiality, rape, adultery, incest....... just because society accepts something as normal and not a sin does not change the Bible!


If your son is having sex with other men, he is not a Christian according to the Bible. Not according to me - according to the Bible. Unless he changes, the day will come he will stand at the judgment and curse you to your face for enabling him, for not trying to help rescue him from his sins.


If your son was a murderer, a drug addict, a thief, would you enable him, pat him on the back and tell him he was going to Heaven? No! You will be guilty of helping to send your son to hell for eternity because you choose to accept his sin and let him believe he is ok.


I'm gay. I struggle. God and I are a million miles away, but I know what the Bible says. I know what I must do to be a Christian, to get to Heaven, and one thing is to avoid lust and sex with other men.


I feel sorry for you and your son. Yes, love him, but don't accept his sin. And make the most of the days you have, for unless he changes, you will be separated for all of eternity. Harsh words? Yes, but true.


Your closing comment.... we are not who is telling people how to live - God is, through his Word. May God have mercy on your son and open his eyes to the truth since his own father is failing him and helping to send him to Hell.

2 comments:

Unknown said...

I think you will have some difficulty finding scientific studies that say life experiences make people gay.

I agree with"John" that it's a good thing God is our judge and not men. True seekers of God don't find a comfort in living a false spiritual life. The Holy Spirit is drawing us in. If you continue both ignoring your own sense of acceptance AND the guiding of the Spirit you will believe the lie and be damned. It's not the same. I believe I will see that man's son.in Heaven.

Alexei Koslov said...

This post is good example on how you can help people simply sharing your story and struggles. Even unexpectedly! One fine day someone replies to a post, such as was done above, and you can give a Christian perspective.

I would only have one caveat - you said "I know what the Bible says. I know what I must do to be a Christian, to get to Heaven, and one thing is to avoid lust and sex with other men." - I get you, I know what you meant. I would only word it differently, otherwise a non Christian or a nominal Christian (as seems to be the case with the man who replied to your post) could get the wrong idea that salvation is all about doing things IN ORDER TO... when, in fact, all has already been accomplished at the cross. As I recently read on a FB post, "if you haven't been changed by grace, you haven't been saved by grace" - so the change is necessary, but not "in order to" but rather "because of", as a consequence of our salvation.

Alexei