Note to DJ

  I was surprised to find out you are a woman, but that definitely doesn't disqualify your input. If at some point you want to share privately how homosexuality has impacted you, feel free. I defintely don't have all the answers, but I obviously know a lot about it.

  You're correct. Homosexuality is a big issue. Thing is, so many people think its all about sex, and it isn't. I believe even the most raging gay guy that claims he is 100% happy with his sexuality, is dealing with deep emotional needs he is trying to bury with sex. A new friend of mine I made through my blog who struggles with SSA was discussing this with me via email: He and I both do not struggle with being attracted to or tempted with lusting after, men we know well, i.e. at church. My best friend struggles with SSA, and I am not attracted to him, nor tempted to lust. Why? Because I feel accepted by these guys. I see them as just guys, not sexual objects. My email friend said if I could see all guys that way, it would help a lot, but I don't. The average attractive, cute, or "hot" guy I run across are guys I feel intimidated by, who I feel I have nothing in common..... they are to me what women are to a heterosexual male - opposite of me, and something to desire and be attracted to.

  I'm starved for male attention and affection. Sex is a poor substitute for godly male affection and camderie, but on some level, it fills that need, though only temporarily and superficially. I don't know your circunmstance, but assume you are close to the someone dealing with SSA. If it is a male, the more positive males he has to affirm him, love him, truly be his friend and care about him, the better off he will be.

  The church has made homosexuality such a bad sin, that guys like me almost feel like we have committed the unpardonable sin. It IS a bad sin, but it is just like any other sin in that God will forgive it as easily and completely as any other...... and as difficult as it seems, deliver from the sin, though deliverance may not look like what I want it to, and will involve work and a close relationship with God.

  Thanks for the book recommendation. If I had not used up all my Amazon gift cards, I'd buy it right now, but will put it on my wish list. Sounds worth reading.

  Thanks also for your birthday wish and prayers, and your input. It is rarer than it should be for Christians to take an interest in the soul and battles of another, especially when they do not know them..... I hope and pray I can do that for someone some day. Your words and prayers are helpful, and I have re-read them and taken them to heart. May God bless you for your kindness.